Home/Business/Becoming a Person of Influence

Becoming a Person of Influence

Name: Becoming a Person of Influence
Rating: 4.27 (5445 reviews)
ISBN: 0785288392

How to Positively Impact the Lives of Others

ByJohn C. Maxwell , Jim Dornan

4.3 (5,445 ratings)

Business Nonfiction Self Help Psychology Christian Communication Leadership Relationships Personal Development Buisness

15 minutes read | Text | 7 key ideas

Listen

Leadership is not an exclusive club reserved for the elite—it's a skill within reach for anyone willing to foster it. In "Becoming a Person of Influence," John Maxwell, a revered figure in leadership education, dismantles the myth that influence is the sole domain of the powerful. He offers an empowering blueprint for transforming ordinary lives into extraordinary ones. This guide delves into four pivotal stages of influence—modeling, motivating, mentoring, and multiplying—equipping readers with ten life-changing attitudes that can spark profound personal and professional growth. Maxwell defines influence as the capacity to inspire joy and success in others, demonstrating that true power lies not in dominance, but in the ability to uplift and guide. Whether you're a seasoned leader or just beginning your journey, this book is your key to unlocking the potential to make a meaningful difference in the world.

Content Type

Book

Binding

Paperback

Year

2006

Publisher

HarperCollins Leadership

Language

English

ASIN

0785288392

ISBN

0785288392

ISBN13

9780785288398

File Download

PDF | EPUB

Becoming a Person of Influence Plot Summary

Introduction

Have you ever wondered why some people seem to make a lasting impact on everyone they meet? It's not about their title, wealth, or even their talents alone. The difference lies in their ability to positively influence others. When you develop this skill, you can transform relationships, elevate your career, and create meaningful change in your community and beyond. Influence isn't something reserved for celebrities, politicians, or CEOs. It's available to everyone willing to develop the right mindset and skills. Whether you're a parent hoping to guide your children, a team leader aiming to inspire your colleagues, or simply someone who wants to make a difference, the principles in these pages will help you connect with others at a deeper level. By mastering the art of positive influence, you'll not only enhance your own life but also leave an indelible mark on the lives of everyone you touch.

Chapter 1: Model Integrity with People

Integrity forms the foundation of lasting influence. At its core, integrity means adhering consistently to moral principles regardless of circumstances. It's about being the same person in private that you are in public. When people trust your character, they become open to your influence in their lives. Jim Dornan shares a revealing story about a time he and his wife Nancy were returning from Europe. After shopping at Escada in London, they arrived at U.S. customs where they declared the expensive clothes they had purchased. The customs agent was shocked, saying, "You're declaring clothes? Nobody declares clothes." As they sorted items by fabric type to determine the proper duty, the agent suddenly recognized Jim from his organization. The agent admitted that seeing Jim's honesty made him reconsider joining the organization his friend had recommended. Nancy's response captured the essence of integrity: "I can spare the money for customs a lot more than I can spare not having a clear conscience." This incident illustrates how integrity operates in everyday situations. Jim and Nancy didn't expect to be recognized; they simply acted with honesty because it reflected their values. Their integrity influenced someone watching them when they least expected it. Genuine integrity isn't situational or conditional. It shows up in small decisions as well as life-changing ones. As Phillips Brooks noted, "Character is made in the small moments of our lives." When you break a moral principle, even in seemingly insignificant ways, you create cracks in your foundation of integrity. These cracks become dangerous when you face pressure or temptation. To strengthen your integrity, make specific commitments. First, dedicate yourself to honesty, reliability, and confidentiality. Second, decide ahead of time that you don't have a price—that you won't compromise for power, revenge, pride, or money. Third, major in minor things by consistently doing what's right in small matters. Finally, do what you should do before what you want to do, following through on responsibilities even when inconvenient. Remember, integrity isn't just your best friend—it's also your friends' best friend. When people know you operate with integrity, they trust that your motives are pure and that you genuinely want to add value to their lives. This trust becomes the gateway to meaningful influence and creates the opportunity to make a lasting positive impact.

Chapter 2: Nurture Others Consistently

Nurturing is the art of caring for others in ways that help them flourish. It's about feeding people emotionally with encouragement, recognition, security, and hope. This process creates a powerful connection that opens hearts and minds to your influence. Consider the story of Jerry and Patty Beaumont, who made a profound impact on Jim and Nancy Dornan's lives. When Nancy and Patty were both pregnant, they formed a friendship. The Beaumonts were living out their spiritual convictions with integrity, which attracted Jim and Nancy. This relationship became crucial when Jim and Nancy's world turned upside down after their son Eric was born with spina bifida. During Eric's first year of life, he underwent eleven brain surgeries in nine months. Through this crisis, Jerry and Patty came alongside them, bringing food, sitting with them in hospital waiting rooms, and sharing their faith. They helped Jim and Nancy see beyond their circumstances to a bigger picture. As Patty told Nancy, "You and Jim can make Eric's problems the center of everything you do, or you can use them as a launching pad for a whole new way of looking at life." This nurturing relationship transformed how Jim and Nancy approached their challenges. Though their contact with the Beaumonts lasted only about a year, their influence continues decades later. Today, Jim and Nancy pass on this nurturing spirit to hundreds of thousands of individuals and families around the world. To become an effective nurturer, focus on giving rather than getting. Give love by showing people you care about them. Offer respect by valuing their feelings, preferences, and opinions. Provide security through consistent, trustworthy behavior. Share recognition by acknowledging their contributions and achievements. Extend encouragement by believing in their potential even when they struggle. When you nurture others effectively, they receive several invaluable gifts: positive self-worth, a sense of belonging, improved perspective, feelings of significance, and hope for the future. These elements create the emotional foundation people need to grow and succeed. To develop your nurturing abilities, commit to others' growth and independence. Believe in their potential. Make yourself accessible when they need support. Give without expecting anything in return. Provide opportunities for them to succeed and grow. And always aim to lift them to a higher level, helping them reach their full potential.

Chapter 3: Build Trust Through Listening

Listening might seem like a simple skill, but it's actually one of the most powerful tools for building influence. When you truly listen to others, you communicate respect, build relationships, increase your knowledge, generate ideas, build loyalty, and create opportunities to help both others and yourself. Jim shares how he learned this lesson early in his career. Fresh from engineering school at Purdue, he worked at McDonnell-Douglas but soon realized he wanted to make a greater impact. When recruiting colleagues to join his new business venture, his initial approach was to bombard them with information and logic. This strategy failed consistently. The turning point came when he simply listened to a colleague sharing his frustrations about his boss and financial struggles. By understanding the man's situation first, Jim could then present his business opportunity as a solution to those specific problems. Jim realized, "I can't succeed with others by dumping information on them. If I want to help them or have a positive impact on people, I need to learn how to listen to them!" Effective listening involves more than just hearing words. It requires giving your undivided attention, avoiding interruptions, focusing on understanding rather than just remembering facts, determining the speaker's immediate need, checking your emotional reactions, suspending judgment until you hear the complete message, summarizing at major intervals, asking clarifying questions, and making listening a priority regardless of how busy you become. Many people overvalue talking and undervalue listening. President Abraham Lincoln understood this balance well, saying, "When I'm getting ready to reason with a man, I spend one third of my time thinking about myself and what I am going to say—and two thirds thinking about him and what he is going to say." This 1:2 ratio of speaking to listening is a good target to maintain. Common barriers to effective listening include mental fatigue, stereotyping others, carrying emotional baggage, and being preoccupied with yourself. These obstacles can be overcome with practice and awareness. The key is to remember that listening is about wanting to hear—making a conscious choice to value what others have to say. John shares a powerful example of listening's impact through the story of Rodney, who attended a talk by Nancy about listening and seeing things from others' perspectives. Rodney had been constantly fighting with his ex-wife Charlotte over money for their two daughters. After hearing Nancy speak, he realized how insensitive he had been. He called Charlotte and simply said, "I want to listen to you. Tell me what your life is like." This approach completely transformed their relationship, as Charlotte shared her struggles as a single parent. By truly listening, Rodney laid the foundation for mutual respect and a new beginning.

Chapter 4: Empower People to Reach Their Potential

Empowerment is the art of giving your influence to others for their personal and organizational growth. When you empower people, you share your authority, position, and opportunities with them to help them function at their best. This process transforms both their lives and your ability to make a lasting impact. The contrast between disempowering and empowering leadership is illustrated by Jim's experience at a rental property in Deer Valley, Utah. After spending thousands of dollars there over eight years, Jim and his group accidentally left a room key in their condo while rushing to catch a flight. The desk clerk rigidly enforced a $25 lost key fee despite Jim's explanation. The clerk's inability to make a customer-friendly decision jeopardized a $100,000 customer relationship over $25. In contrast, Nancy shared how a Nordstrom salesperson offered to hem pajamas she had purchased and personally deliver them to their home that night—for a relatively small purchase. The difference lies in Nordstrom's empowerment philosophy, captured in their famous one-rule employee handbook: "Rule #1: Use your good judgment in all situations. There will be no additional rules." Nordstrom emphasizes people over policies, believing in their employees and releasing them to achieve excellence. To effectively empower others, you need four qualifications: position (authority over those you wish to empower), relationship (a genuine connection with them), respect (mutual appreciation), and commitment (dedication to the empowerment process). With these elements in place, you can begin transferring your authority to help others grow. The empowerment process follows several key steps. First, evaluate people's knowledge, skills, and desire related to the tasks you'll give them. Next, model the behavior and performance you expect. Then give them permission to succeed by expressing your confidence in them both privately and publicly. Transfer appropriate authority to them, allowing them to make decisions and solve problems independently. Supply regular feedback to guide their development. Finally, release them to continue on their own once they've demonstrated competence. The results of empowerment benefit everyone involved. The organization gains increased effectiveness and innovation. The empowered individuals develop greater confidence and capabilities. And you, as the empowerer, gain more time for important priorities while extending your influence through others. Mitch Sala, whom Jim has empowered over the years, expressed the impact of this process in a letter: "Your influence on me started before we even met... As I observed you, I sensed an incredible depth of character in you. I admired that and wanted it myself... Everything has changed in my life." Through Jim's empowerment, Mitch has become a world-class influencer who touches hundreds of thousands of lives in over twenty countries annually.

Chapter 5: Reproduce Your Influence in Others

The ultimate level of influence comes when you develop leaders who can develop other leaders. This multiplication process creates an expanding ripple effect that extends your impact far beyond what you could achieve personally. Rich DeVos exemplifies this principle in Jim's life. As founder of Amway, owner of the NBA's Orlando Magic, and president of multiple foundations, DeVos understood the value of raising up leaders. Jim recalls how DeVos's message about free enterprise, individual worth, dreams, freedom, and "compassionate capitalism" transformed his thinking. DeVos not only influenced Jim directly but also equipped him to influence others, creating a powerful multiplication effect. This multiplication process offers several key benefits. First, it raises your influence to a new level—when you influence leaders, you indirectly influence everyone they influence. Second, it raises the new leaders' personal potential by removing the lid on what they can accomplish. Third, it multiplies resources by creating more time, wisdom, and loyalty. Finally, it ensures a positive future for your organization by developing a pipeline of capable leaders. John experienced this benefit firsthand when he left Skyline Wesleyan Church after fourteen years to focus on INJOY. About a year later, he received a note from Jayne Hansen that read: "I was just thinking about Skyline and how it is really thriving since you've left... It's such an absolute TRIBUTE to the kind of leadership and lay ministry that you developed... I can think of no greater honor than that a man pour his life into something, leave, and have it flourish!" To become an effective reproducer of leaders, start by leading yourself well. As Truett Cathy, founder of Chick-Fil-A, said, "The number one reason leaders are unsuccessful is their inability to lead themselves." Develop a program for personal growth and leadership development. Continuously look for potential leaders to develop. Put the team first, focusing on others' success rather than personal recognition. And most importantly, commit yourself to developing leaders, not just followers. The development process progresses through five stages: scramble (constantly replacing people), survival (maintaining but not developing people), siphon (developing people who leave), synergy (developing and keeping good leaders), and significance (developing leaders who develop other leaders). Only about 1% of leaders reach the significance level, but those who do create almost limitless growth and influence. Jim shares the inspiring story of how this multiplication works in practice: "Mitch has become more than just an influencer. He has gone through the entire development process himself and now is a great reproducer of influencers too." One of Mitch's success stories is Robert Angkasa, a former Citibank vice president from Indonesia. Robert says, "The turning point in my life came when I met Mitch... Today I am tasting the sweetness of a new life... What I am trying to do now is be to others what he's been to me." Today, Robert impacts thousands throughout Asia, continuing the chain of influence.

Summary

The journey to becoming a person of influence follows a clear progression. It begins with modeling integrity in all your interactions, nurturing others through encouragement and support, and building trust through authentic listening. As your influence grows, you empower people by sharing your authority and resources, ultimately reproducing your influence by developing leaders who develop other leaders. As John Maxwell wisely notes, "Everything rises and falls on leadership. When you raise up and empower leaders, you positively impact yourself, your organization, the people you develop, and all the people their lives touch." Your opportunity to make a difference starts today. Choose one person in your life—a colleague, family member, or friend—and begin applying these principles consistently. Listen more attentively, offer sincere encouragement, share your knowledge and resources, and look for opportunities to empower them. Remember that influence isn't about position or power; it's about genuinely caring for others and helping them reach their potential. The impact you create through this approach will extend far beyond what you can imagine, creating a legacy of positive influence that continues long after you're gone.

Best Quote

“In most cases, those who want power probably shouldn't have it, those who enjoy it probably do so for the wrong reasons, and those who want most to hold on to it don't understand that it's only temporary.” ― John C. Maxwell, Becoming a Person of Influence: How to Positively Impact the Lives of Others

Review Summary

Strengths: The review highlights the first chapter as exceptionally valuable, emphasizing its focus on trust and integrity as key components of influence. The book is praised for its well-structured chapters and its applicability to personal and professional development. The inclusion of quotes from famous individuals at key points is also appreciated. Weaknesses: The review briefly mentions a negative aspect, noting a perceived overemphasis on faith, worship, and Christianity, which may not appeal to all readers. Overall Sentiment: Enthusiastic Key Takeaway: The book is highly recommended for those seeking to improve their influence, particularly in professional settings, by emphasizing trust and integrity. Despite some religious undertones that may not resonate with everyone, the book is considered a valuable resource for personal and professional growth.