Getting to Neutral

Getting to Neutral Plot Summary

Introduction

Life throws challenges at us daily, from minor setbacks to major crises that shake our foundations. In these moments, our mental response determines whether we spiral into negativity or find a path forward. Most of us have been taught that positive thinking is the answer - just believe everything will work out! But what happens when positivity feels impossible or even counterproductive? This is where neutral thinking comes in - a powerful mental approach that doesn't require forced optimism or succumb to debilitating negativity. Instead, it offers a judgment-free, fact-based method to assess situations and make clear decisions even in chaos. By learning to downshift to neutral, you gain the ability to see things as they truly are, not worse than they are (negative thinking) or better than they are (blind positivity). The pages ahead will show you how to master this mental skill that elite performers use to thrive under pressure, and how you can apply it to transform your own response to life's inevitable challenges.

Chapter 1: Downshift to Neutral: Breaking Free from Negativity

Neutral thinking begins with recognizing that our default mental setting often leans negative. This isn't a character flaw - it's how humans are wired. Studies show we're hardwired to notice threats and remember negative experiences more vividly than positive ones. This served our ancestors well when survival depended on identifying dangers quickly, but in today's world, this tendency can hijack our decision-making and emotional well-being. Trevor Moawad discovered the power of neutral thinking through his work with elite athletes and military personnel. While working with NFL quarterback Russell Wilson, Moawad noticed something remarkable about Wilson's mental approach. Whether Wilson had just thrown four touchdowns or four interceptions, his demeanor remained consistent. He didn't get overly excited by success or devastated by failure. Instead, he assessed the situation factually, learned what he could, and focused entirely on the next play. This wasn't emotional detachment - it was mental discipline that allowed Wilson to perform at his best regardless of circumstances. The concept crystallized for Moawad during a challenging hike in Arizona. After pushing himself too hard in 111-degree heat, he found himself exhausted in his car. Looking down at the gear shift, he noticed the "N" for neutral illuminated. In that moment, he realized this was the perfect metaphor for the mental state he'd been teaching. A vehicle in neutral is ready to move in any direction once the driver decides where to go. Similarly, a mind in neutral can assess situations clearly before choosing the next action. To downshift to neutral when facing a crisis, start by acknowledging the situation without judgment. When Moawad received his cancer diagnosis, he didn't catastrophize or force positivity. Instead, he asked his doctor: "What do you need from me to execute?" This simple question shifted focus from the overwhelming big picture to the immediate next steps. He limited information intake to only what was necessary for the current moment, avoiding internet searches that might increase anxiety. The process of downshifting to neutral requires practice. Begin by recognizing when your thoughts turn negative. Notice the physical sensations that accompany negative thinking - perhaps tension in your shoulders or a knot in your stomach. Then consciously shift to factual statements. Instead of "This is terrible, I'll never recover," try "This situation is challenging, but I've handled difficult things before." Remove emotionally charged language and focus on what you know to be true. Remember that neutral thinking isn't about suppressing emotions. You'll still feel fear, anger, or sadness when appropriate. The difference is that these emotions won't dictate your next move. By creating space between stimulus and response, you gain the freedom to choose your path forward based on facts rather than fear.

Chapter 2: Choose Your Next Right Step

Once you've downshifted to neutral, the critical question becomes: What is my next right step? This concept forms the backbone of effective neutral thinking. Rather than becoming overwhelmed by the entirety of a challenge, you focus solely on the immediate action that will move you forward. UCLA women's basketball coach Cori Close embraced this approach during the pandemic-disrupted 2020-2021 season. Her team faced extraordinary obstacles - three players opted out of the season, two international recruits were stuck in Australia due to immigration restrictions, and COVID protocols frequently limited practice. With just eight available players, the situation could have easily led to despair. During a critical moment in a game against Oregon, Close's team had built a 10-point lead in the fourth quarter, but Oregon was mounting a comeback. During a timeout, guard Lindsey Corsaro spoke up: "This is when neutral thinking counts. Right now. We practice this every day. Everybody ask themselves: 'What does this situation require of me?'" This simple question cut through potential panic and focused each player on their specific responsibility. Despite Oregon tying the score, UCLA's Michaela Onyenwere followed her missed shot with a rebound and game-winning layup. Afterward, teammate Charisma Osborne explained, "We didn't let that rattle us. We talk about staying neutral and moving on to the next play." This approach works because it prevents us from becoming paralyzed by the magnitude of challenges. When Michigan State football coach Mel Tucker took over the program just weeks before the pandemic hit in 2020, he faced a seemingly impossible situation. Unable to meet his players in person, conduct normal practices, or establish team culture through traditional means, Tucker could have easily become overwhelmed. Instead, he focused on the next right step each day, adapting to constantly changing regulations and circumstances. To implement this in your own life, start by asking Lindsey Corsaro's powerful question: "What does this situation require of me?" This shifts focus from what you can't control to what you can. When facing a difficult coworker, rather than asking "Why is this person doing this to me?" (which leads nowhere productive), ask what the situation requires - perhaps setting a boundary, documenting behavior, or having a direct conversation. The next right step approach also helps in personal crises. When Moawad faced cancer treatment, he didn't fixate on five-year survival rates or worst-case scenarios. He asked his doctor what the next step was and focused entirely on that. This prevented his mind from spinning into anxiety about possibilities that might never materialize. Practice identifying your next right step by breaking down large challenges into smaller actions. For a job search, today's right step might be updating your resume rather than worrying about interviews that haven't happened yet. For health goals, it might be preparing one nutritious meal rather than obsessing over losing twenty pounds. By stacking these small right steps, you create momentum that carries you through even the most daunting challenges.

Chapter 3: Align Your Values with Your Actions

Living neutrally requires a solid foundation, and that foundation is built on your values. Values are what you prioritize at a given moment based on a lifetime of accumulated information. They become your baseline, consciously or subconsciously steering your decisions and behaviors. Without clarity about what truly matters to you, neutral thinking becomes difficult because you lack the reference points needed to evaluate situations objectively. Trevor Moawad's own values journey began during his freshman year of college when he experienced serious health issues that forced him to drop out temporarily. This crisis prompted deep reflection about what truly mattered to him. Growing up as the son of a nationally renowned motivational speaker who emphasized positive thinking, Moawad had absorbed many of his father's teachings but hadn't fully examined his own beliefs. During his recovery, Moawad attended a basketball camp that doubled as a Christian retreat. As a Catholic, he felt out of place among the evangelical Christians who seemed so certain about their faith. He admired their conviction but couldn't authentically adopt their approach. One counselor named Shann Ferch particularly impressed him. Ferch explained that he "played on fire for the Lord," meaning his faith gave him freedom from the anxiety that plagued Moawad on the basketball court. Moawad desperately wanted that freedom but couldn't find it through the same path. After weeks of struggling to adopt others' values, Moawad had a breakthrough conversation with his youth minister back home. The minister told him, "Life is in the questions. You were right to ask them." He explained that while some people find all their answers in religious texts, others must discover their own path. "The truth is to find out the individual values that are important to you and live your life in adherence with them," the minister advised. "This creates alignment. This creates congruency." This alignment between values and actions is crucial for neutral thinking. When your behaviors match your values, decisions become clearer because you have an internal compass guiding you. To identify your values, try this exercise: Draw a line down the middle of a notecard. On the left side, write "Five Values" and number one through five. On the right side, write "Five Goals" and number one through five. On the back, write "Current Behavior" on the left and "Ideal Behavior" on the right. Now examine the connections. If family time is a value, your goal might be spending less time browsing social media and more time engaged with loved ones. If health is a value, your goal might be regular exercise. The key insight comes when you compare your stated values with your actual behaviors. Often, we discover misalignments that explain why we feel frustrated or unfulfilled. This exercise reveals what psychologists call the illusion of choice. While we technically have many options in life, living in alignment with our values narrows these choices considerably. If you value both career success and family time, saying no to weekend work events isn't really a choice - it's the only option that aligns with your values. Values can change over time, which is why regular reassessment is important. The values that drove you at twenty may not serve you at forty. When life circumstances change dramatically - through illness, career shifts, or relationship changes - revisiting your values helps you navigate these transitions with greater clarity and purpose.

Chapter 4: Build Winning Habits That Last

Once you've identified your values and aligned your goals with them, the next step is creating habits that support those goals. As Admiral William McRaven famously told University of Texas graduates, "If you want to change the world, start by making your bed." This simple habit, drilled into him during Navy SEAL training, creates a small win first thing each morning that can cascade into other accomplishments throughout the day. Baseball legend Ichiro Suzuki understood the power of habits from an early age. In a sixth-grade essay titled "My Dream," young Ichiro wrote: "My dream is to become a first-class professional baseball player. To make this dream come true, I have to play very well in the National middle and high school baseball leagues, and in order to do so, I need to practice." He then detailed how he had been practicing baseball 360 days a year since third grade, allowing himself only "five or six hours a week" to play with friends. This dedication to daily practice continued throughout Ichiro's career. While playing for the Seattle Mariners, he maintained elaborate pre-game stretching routines that teammates couldn't replicate. He stored his bats in a humidor and meticulously inspected his jerseys before games, clipping any stray threads. These weren't just superstitions - they were habits that reinforced his identity as an elite hitter who paid attention to every detail. The result? Over 3,000 hits in Major League Baseball after already collecting 1,278 hits in Japan. NBA star Stephen Curry demonstrates similar habit formation. Basketball coach Allen Stein Jr. recalls meeting Curry at the 2007 Kobe Bryant Skills Academy. While other talented players arrived just in time for scheduled workouts, Curry would be on the court 30 minutes early, practicing situational shots. During drills, he would self-correct his form without coaching. After workouts, he wouldn't leave until he had swished (not just made) five consecutive free throws. These habits, maintained day after day, transformed Curry into one of basketball's greatest shooters. To build your own winning habits, start by examining what you do daily that either supports or undermines your values. Lawrence Frank, president of basketball operations for the Los Angeles Clippers, offers this insight: "Behaviors really have to supersede your feelings. Sometimes you have to behave your way into feeling it versus feeling your way into behaving." In other words, don't wait until you feel motivated to start good habits - create the habits first, and the motivation will follow. The key to habit formation is consistency, not intensity. Making your bed every morning may seem trivial compared to your larger goals, but it's the accumulation of small actions that creates lasting change. As Ichiro said about his approach to baseball: "In reality, you can't make a much greater effort than others, but I feel it's very important to try a bit harder over and over again." Start by identifying one small habit that aligns with your values and commit to it daily for two weeks. If health matters to you, perhaps it's drinking water first thing each morning. If career growth matters, perhaps it's reading industry news for ten minutes daily. The specific habit matters less than the consistency with which you perform it.

Chapter 5: Control Your Inputs and Protect Your Focus

In today's hyper-connected world, we face an unprecedented battle for our attention. Every notification, headline, and social media post competes for limited mental bandwidth, often leaving us overwhelmed and unfocused. To live neutrally, you must become deliberate about what information you allow into your mind. Moawad conducted an experiment on himself to test how negative inputs affect mental state. For nearly a month, he bombarded himself with negative stimuli - sad country songs, heavy metal, cable news, and other sources of negativity. The result? After just 26 days, he described himself as "basically an emotional mud puddle." This experience convinced him that controlling inputs was even more critical than he had initially believed. This lesson became particularly relevant during the COVID-19 pandemic. A 2020 study by researchers from Dartmouth College and Brown University found that 87 percent of pandemic-related news stories from major U.S. media sources were negative in tone - significantly more negative than similar coverage in other countries or in scientific journals. Even positive developments, like vaccine progress, were often framed negatively. This constant negativity created what some called "doomscrolling" - the compulsive consumption of bad news despite its harmful effects on mental health. Georgia football coach Kirby Smart understood the danger of negative inputs when preparing his team for the 2017 SEC Championship game. He presented players with a simple but powerful concept: "STARVE YOUR DISTRACTIONS/FEED YOUR FOCUS." Smart knew that the increased media attention and pressure surrounding a championship game could easily derail his players' performance. By consciously limiting negative or distracting inputs, players could maintain the mental clarity needed to perform at their best. Professional golfer Will Zalatoris applied this principle during his first Masters Tournament in 2021. Following advice from former Dallas Cowboys quarterback Tony Romo, Zalatoris turned off his phone when the tournament began and left it off. This decision protected him from the social media frenzy that developed around his resemblance to a character from the movie "Happy Gilmore." By controlling his inputs, Zalatoris finished second in the tournament, earning $1.2 million and securing his PGA Tour status. To control your own inputs, start by conducting an audit of your information diet. Track how much time you spend consuming news, social media, and entertainment for one week. Note how each source makes you feel afterward - energized, neutral, or drained. Then make deliberate choices about what to eliminate or reduce. This isn't about being uninformed; it's about being selectively informed in ways that support rather than undermine your mental state. Next, create boundaries around technology use. Consider implementing a "phone-free zone" in your bedroom or designating specific times when you check email and social media rather than responding to every notification. UCLA's women's basketball team has a policy that phones must stay in bags from the parking lot until players reach their lockers, ensuring everyone engages with teammates rather than screens during that time. Remember that what you let in, you compete against mentally. Every negative headline, angry comment, or anxiety-inducing post requires mental energy to process. By starving your distractions and feeding your focus, you preserve that energy for what truly matters in your life.

Chapter 6: Assemble Your Support Team

No one achieves greatness alone. Even the most independent among us need others who can provide perspective, support, and accountability during life's challenges. As you work to master neutral thinking, strategically assembling your support team becomes a critical component of success. When Moawad was diagnosed with cancer in 2019, he initially planned to keep his circle extremely tight. He didn't want to burden others with his struggle or create the obligation for them to provide emotional support. However, this approach changed after conversations with Mark Herzlich, a former Boston College linebacker who had battled cancer before playing in the NFL. Herzlich understood Moawad's instinct to handle the challenge alone because he had initially done the same. "It was way too much for me to handle alone," Herzlich told him, explaining how he had tried to shield even his parents from knowing how sick he felt. Herzlich convinced Moawad that expanding his support team wasn't just acceptable - it was necessary for survival. With this guidance, Moawad carefully selected people who could help him navigate his cancer journey. Lawrence Frank, president of basketball operations for the Los Angeles Clippers, became what Moawad called "the anchor of my team." Frank had experience supporting his wife through chronic medical issues and understood the frustration of treatment delays and endless appointments. During walks along Manhattan Beach, Frank listened without judgment and helped Moawad stay neutral when his mind started catastrophizing. Michigan State football coach Mel Tucker provided a different kind of support. As someone who deeply understood neutral thinking from working with Moawad at Alabama and Georgia, Tucker could help redirect Moawad's thinking when it veered negative. Tucker also showed his belief in Moawad by hiring him to work with Michigan State's team even as Moawad recovered from surgery - a vote of confidence that provided purpose during a difficult time. Other team members included Russell Wilson, whose faith provided spiritual strength; Jon Schultz, who attended chemotherapy treatments; Jeff Allen, Alabama's associate athletic director for sports medicine, who Moawad could be emotionally vulnerable with; and even Moawad's ex-wife Solange, who supported him despite having no obligation to do so. To build your own support team, look for these key characteristics: People who ask "How can I help?" rather than focusing on how your situation affects them. People who can connect you with others who have relevant expertise or experience. People who speak your language - who understand your values and thinking style. People you aspire to be like, whose qualities you wish to develop in yourself. People who share your faith or spiritual outlook, if that's important to you. People who love you unconditionally, regardless of circumstances. Don't wait for a crisis to build this team. Start evaluating your current relationships and identifying gaps. Perhaps you have plenty of cheerleaders but lack someone who will give honest feedback. Maybe you have career mentors but need someone who understands personal challenges. By consciously developing these relationships during calm periods, you'll have support ready when storms arrive. Remember that being part of someone else's support team is equally valuable. The relationships that sustain us through difficulties are reciprocal, built on mutual trust and a willingness to be present for others as they have been for us.

Summary

The path to neutral thinking isn't about eliminating emotions or becoming detached from life's experiences. Rather, it's about creating mental space between stimulus and response - a space where clear-headed decisions can emerge even in chaotic circumstances. By downshifting to neutral, choosing your next right step, aligning your values with your actions, building winning habits, controlling your inputs, and assembling your support team, you develop the mental architecture needed to thrive in an unpredictable world. As Trevor Moawad reminds us, "Life isn't going to get easier. It's always going to be messy. There will always be a challenge or a pandemic or some other unplanned disaster." The power of neutral thinking lies not in avoiding these challenges but in facing them with clarity and purpose. In Moawad's words, "I know I'll find the strength soon to take off those glasses and see a different next step. But even as that fear remains, I'm still behaving my way to a better future." Today, take one small step toward neutral thinking - perhaps by identifying a negative thought pattern and replacing it with factual statements, or by examining one area where your actions don't align with your stated values. This single step, repeated consistently, can transform how you navigate life's inevitable challenges.

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Trevor Moawad

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