This Is Day One

This Is Day One Plot Summary

Introduction

It was the morning of my first day as a team leader, and I stood frozen outside the conference room door. My promotion had come with congratulations and expectations, but no handbook on how to actually lead. Everyone inside was waiting for me to set the tone, chart the course, and embody something called "leadership" - a concept that suddenly seemed terrifyingly abstract. In that moment, I realized that despite years of education and professional experience, I had been preparing to get leadership positions without actually learning how to lead. This moment of truth - standing at the threshold of leadership - is one we all face, whether we're taking on a formal title or simply trying to make a positive impact in our everyday interactions. The journey to authentic leadership isn't about grand gestures or charismatic speeches. It begins with a single day - Day One - when we decide to align our actions with our deepest values. Through personal stories that range from moving to hilarious, heartbreaking to inspiring, this exploration of everyday leadership shows how small, consistent actions driven by clear personal values can transform not only our influence on others but our own sense of purpose and fulfillment. The path forward isn't about becoming someone else, but about recognizing and operationalizing the leadership potential that already exists within you, starting today.

Chapter 1: The Lollipop Moment: How Small Actions Create Leadership Legacy

I was twenty-five years old, at a goodbye party marking the end of my time at university, when a young woman I didn't recognize approached me. "You don't know who I am," she began, "but I remember the first time I met you." She described how four years earlier, on her first day of college registration, she had been overwhelmed by doubt and anxiety, ready to quit before she'd even begun. Her parents had convinced her to at least try one day before giving up. As she stood in the registration line, fighting panic, I had apparently appeared wearing what she described as "the stupidest hat I've ever seen on a man," carrying a bucket of lollipops for a cystic fibrosis fundraiser. I'd stopped beside her, noticed the nervous young man next to her, and handed him a lollipop, suggesting: "Dude, you're going to be stuck in this line for another two hours. The woman next to you is absolutely beautiful. Break the ice, big guy." When he nervously offered her the candy without making eye contact, I had theatrically turned to her parents and loudly exclaimed: "Look at your little girl! It's her first day away from home, and already she's taking candy from a stranger!" Everyone around them had erupted in laughter, and in that moment, something shifted for her. "I decided not to quit that day," she told me. "And I never did. I graduate in a few weeks." After a pause, she added one final detail: "I've been dating that guy for four years since you introduced us. We're getting married next year." The most astonishing part? I had absolutely no recollection of this interaction that had changed the course of her life. This "lollipop moment" taught me something profound about leadership. For years, I had been working to achieve goals that would earn me titles and influence, believing those were the markers of leadership. Yet here was evidence that perhaps the most significant impact I'd ever had on another human being happened in a moment I didn't even remember – an ordinary interaction where I wasn't trying to be a leader, just trying to create a moment of connection and humor. True leadership isn't measured by the goals we achieve but by how we behave in pursuit of those goals. It's found in the everyday moments when we create positive impact, often without realizing it. Our leadership legacy is built not on grand achievements but on consistent, value-driven actions that may seem small in the moment but ripple outward in ways we can never fully know.

Chapter 2: Courage and the Five Seconds of Extraordinary Bravery

After a presentation at a university, a young man approached me hesitantly. His friend had explained that he dealt with severe social anxiety but wanted to speak with me. Throughout our conversation, he would periodically walk away, gather himself, and return, apologizing each time for the interruption. When I assured him no apology was necessary and acknowledged his courage in approaching a stranger despite his anxiety, he shared something I've never forgotten. "Mr. Dudley," he said, still looking at the floor, "dealing with this for so long has taught me something pretty simple: the quality of my life is really going to depend on how often I'm willing to ask myself, 'Am I capable of five seconds of extraordinary courage right now?'" His words struck me profoundly. The beauty of this question is that the answer is always yes. We are all capable of five seconds of courage at any given moment. The challenge isn't in those five seconds – it's in our fear of what might happen afterward. We're not afraid of saying hello, asking for the promotion, or standing up for what's right. We're afraid of the rejection, embarrassment, or conflict that might follow. I began asking myself this question in critical moments: before important presentations, when considering whether to voice an unpopular opinion, and even when debating whether to ask someone special on a first date. The question helps us focus only on the immediate action required, not the imagined consequences that paralyze us. This simple framing illustrates the difference between confidence and courage. Confidence is acting like something doesn't scare you; courage is doing something even though it does. And while confidence can be faked, courage is only demonstrated through action. The young man's insight revealed that courage, not confidence, is what defines leaders. Leaders aren't fearless – they're simply people who don't allow fear to lead to inaction. They recognize that courage, like any muscle, needs consistent exercise to grow stronger. By practicing those five seconds of extraordinary courage in small daily challenges, we build the capacity to face larger ones. The key is not waiting until you need courage to discover how much you have, but developing it every day so you understand the depth of your capacity when facing life's inevitable pivotal moments.

Chapter 3: Impact: Recognizing the Leadership Around Us

On a nostalgic trip back to my old high school, I was waiting in the principal's office when Mr. Peters, one of the custodians, spotted me through the window. He immediately rushed in for a warm embrace, exclaiming, "Drew Dudley! It's so great to see you!" I was stunned – it had been fifteen years since I'd last seen him, and he worked in a place with over 1,200 students passing through each year. When I expressed my amazement that he remembered my name, his response floored me: "Remember your name? Drew, I've been following your whole career! I'm so proud of you!" Mr. Peters had been at the school for over twenty years when I was a student. What made him extraordinary wasn't just that he knew every student's name – it was how he seemed to intuitively know which students felt bullied, alienated, or insecure, and would make a point of stopping on his rounds to talk with them. He always remembered where conversations had left off, creating a remarkable sense of connection. Many difficult high school days had been made bearable by his kindness. Standing there as an adult, I realized I couldn't miss this opportunity to recognize his leadership. I told him about my work speaking on leadership and emphasized that the type of leadership I focused on was exactly what he embodied every day – making a positive impact, one person at a time. His response? A dismissive shrug and the words: "Aw, I'm just a janitor lucky enough to know all of you before you hit the big time." This moment illuminated how our narrow definition of leadership prevents so many people from recognizing their own impact. Our lives and workplaces are filled with "I'm just a..." people: "I'm just a receptionist," "I'm just middle management," "I'm just a stay-at-home mom." Yet when I ask successful alumni from my high school if they remember Mr. Peters, every single one smiles at the mention of his name – twenty years later. That is a remarkable life. That is leadership. The problem isn't that there's a shortage of leadership in our world – it's that we've defined leadership so narrowly that we fail to recognize most of it. Leaders aren't identified by their jobs or titles, but by how they choose to do them. When we treat leadership as something reserved for those with certain positions or achievements, we miss the opportunity to celebrate and reinforce the everyday leadership happening all around us. Perhaps the most powerful way to embody leadership ourselves is to actively look for and acknowledge it in others, creating a cycle where leadership recognized becomes leadership created.

Chapter 4: Values as Decision-Making Criteria

In the midst of my career at a university, I found myself challenged by an eighteen-year-old student who approached me after my first leadership workshop. "Sir," she said shyly, "I don't get it anymore." When I asked what confused her, she explained: "In my country, we're taught that the smartest people make the best leaders. The smartest people get the best grades, and if you get good grades, it shows the world you deserve to be a leader. But what you talked about today makes me think leadership means something different in Canadian." After a pause, she asked: "Can you explain to me what 'leadership' means in simple English?" I opened my mouth to provide my well-rehearsed definition of leadership – a definition I was sure would be brilliant. But nothing came out. My mind was blank. I knew leadership theories and could explain how leadership had been studied throughout history, but I couldn't articulate what leadership meant to me "in simple English." It was one of those questions you're certain you can answer until someone actually asks it. This moment revealed something profound: I had never clearly defined the values I hoped to embody in my life. The problem is this: if you don't take time to define the things you hope will define you, you'll always feel you aren't living up to the person you want to be. How can you give yourself credit for hitting a target you've never identified? If you don't clearly define what "leadership," "respect," or "accountability" mean to you – if you don't turn them into specific goals so you know when you've hit them – you may be embodying those values every day but never giving yourself the opportunity to acknowledge that fact. Values serve as decision-making criteria – clear principles against which potential choices can be evaluated. When you identify your core values and define them precisely, you create a litmus test for the options available to you in any situation. Faced with a difficult choice, you can hold each potential action up against your values and ask, "Which option is most consistent with these values?" This doesn't mean the decision will be easy – often, the option most aligned with your values isn't the one that brings immediate rewards or avoids consequences. However, the option most consistent with your values is the one you'll be glad you chose five years from now. Acting inconsistently with your values takes an intellectual and emotional toll that builds over time, while aligning your actions with your deepest values creates a foundation for sustained leadership and personal satisfaction, regardless of your formal position or title.

Chapter 5: Creating Questions That Drive Daily Action

During a pivotal experiment with my leadership students, we chose to focus on a single value: impact. We defined it as "a commitment to creating moments that cause people to feel better off for having interacted with you." Initially, we tried a straightforward approach – each student would do something each day that created a moment of impact and report it to me. But I noticed something troubling: they weren't actively seeking opportunities for impact throughout their day. Instead, they'd pause outside my office at the end of the day, thinking back to identify something they'd already done that might qualify. We needed a different approach, and it came from combining two psychological phenomena: the Zeigarnik effect (we remember incomplete tasks better than completed ones) and the question-behavior effect (asking questions about future behavior can actually change that behavior). Instead of simply committing to create impact, what if we posed a specific question that would drive impact-creating behavior? After much brainstorming, we created this question: "What have I done today to recognize someone else's leadership?" Our thinking was simple – it would be unlikely for someone to walk away from an interaction where they were called a leader without feeling better for having had that interaction. You couldn't answer the question without creating an impact. The question transformed our behavior. One evening shortly after we began this experiment, I found myself in a packed grocery store observing an extraordinary cashier. Her arms were a blur as she scanned items at breakneck speed, yet she greeted each customer warmly despite receiving little acknowledgment in return. Watching her, I realized this was a perfect opportunity to answer our question. When I reached the front of the line, I noticed the exhaustion and frustration in her eyes. After asking which chocolates she recommended and purchasing them, I told her they were for her – that I taught leadership and her approach to her job exemplified exactly the kind of leadership I used as an example. To my surprise, she began to cry, explaining that no one had even been polite to her all day. That simple recognition changed not only her day but likely how she would interact with her family that evening. This process of "operationalizing leadership values" – identifying a key value, clearly defining it, and creating a question that drives daily action aligned with that value – provides a framework for consistent leadership practice. The questions serve as prompts for behavior we're capable of but often fail to prioritize. They move our values from abstract concepts to concrete daily actions. By embedding these questions into our routine, we ensure that our behavior consistently reflects who we want to be, rather than letting our leadership be scattershot and unconscious. The beauty of this approach is that it works regardless of title or position – it's a form of leadership available to everyone, every day, in every interaction.

Chapter 6: Self-Respect: Being Your Own Best Advocate

During one of my darkest periods of burnout and exhaustion, I embarked on a cross-country train journey seeking solitude and renewal. Early in the trip, I met a remarkable girl of about eight named Allison who bounced into the lounge car with the energy of a bumblebee. After several laps around the train, she plopped down beside me and introduced herself. When she asked what I was reading, I replied it was "just a book for work." Her eyes widened with wonder that anyone could read books for work, and she asked about the story. When I explained somewhat shamefully that my dry, theoretical book didn't really have a story, she tilted her head quizzically and asked, "Don't all books have stories?" Eventually, I asked why she had been running up and down the train. "Well," she explained with the wisdom of a sage, "my parents say that I have a very big spirit. In fact, they say that my spirit is too big for basically every room that I'm in." She continued, "If my spirit is too big for rooms, it is definitely too big for hallways. And anytime I'm stuck somewhere that isn't big enough to fit my spirit, I run. I run to remind myself that I'm always free if I want to be." Her matter-of-fact declaration – "I'm always free if I want to be" – struck me profoundly. When had I last reveled in my freedom or acted to remind myself that my life was ultimately mine to control? With a single sentence, Allison reminded me of the man I could be: passionate, outgoing, full of life. I shared these thoughts with her, and she responded with devastating clarity: "Drew, I do not mean to be rude, but I don't think anyone whose spirit is too big for hallways would ever read a book without a good story." This encounter revealed a fundamental truth about self-respect: unhappiness is inevitable when you allow a gap to form between your conception of who you are and how you behave. I had always thought of myself as someone who could connect with others and add value, who seized opportunities to learn and try new things. Yet I had booked a single sleeper car, avoided interaction, and planned to bury myself in dry books for weeks. The behaviors of the man in my head could not have been more different than the behaviors of the man on that train. Self-respect begins with closing this gap – with making decisions that honor who you truly are rather than what others expect. It means recognizing that no one will respect you more than you respect yourself. It requires treating yourself well, cultivating your own happiness, and acknowledging that you have as much right to happiness as anyone else. When we fail to advocate for our own well-being and authenticity, we diminish our capacity to lead others effectively. Leadership doesn't flow from titles or achievements but from alignment between our values and actions, between our identity and our behavior. As Allison's wisdom suggests, we must make space for our spirits to run free if we hope to inspire others to do the same.

Chapter 7: Cultivating Happiness Through Planned Leadership

At the beginning of my weight-loss journey, I found myself staring at a TEDx video of myself, horrified by what I saw. Despite looking in mirrors daily, it took seeing myself on screen to confront a truth I'd been avoiding: at over 300 pounds, my health was in serious jeopardy. As someone who spoke about values like self-respect and discipline, I realized I couldn't authentically discuss these concepts while making choices that undermined my well-being. I knew I needed to change, but previous attempts had failed. Then I realized I should apply the same Day One approach I used for operationalizing leadership values. I needed daily questions that would drive weight-loss behaviors, not just a vague commitment to "eat better." I consulted a nutritionist friend who provided three specific questions: 1. Have I eaten less than 1,800 calories today? 2. Have I burned more than 3,000 calories today? 3. Have I done fifteen more seconds of cardio than yesterday? But her second insight was far more important: "Failure is part of life – it's inevitable. You should build failure into absolutely every plan you create." She explained that anything not part of our plan kills momentum, but if failure is already built in, it becomes an expected part of the journey rather than a momentum killer. She recommended building in 65 "failure days" where I wouldn't have to answer the questions, with only one restriction: I couldn't use any of them in the first two weeks. One year later, I was 100 pounds lighter, having answered those questions on 300 of 365 days. The process worked because I treated each day as Day One, telling myself each night: "You can go over 1,800 calories on day two. Tomorrow is day two." When I woke up the next morning, my first thought would be: "Yesterday was a win. That day goes on a pile, and when that pile hits 300, I'll be 100 pounds lighter." Every such morning felt like a victory, giving me the momentum and confidence to say: "Today is Day One again." This approach applies to all aspects of leadership development. By creating daily questions that operationalize your key values – whether they relate to courage, impact, empowerment, or any other value central to your identity – you establish a framework for consistent action. Building in expected failure days prevents perfectionism from derailing your progress. The cumulative effect of treating each day as Day One – a fresh opportunity to align your actions with your values – creates momentum that transforms not only how you lead others but how you lead yourself. The beauty of this approach is that it doesn't depend on position, title, or external recognition. It allows each of us to cultivate leadership from within, creating a personal culture where our daily actions consistently reflect our deepest values. When we commit to answering even one value-driven question each day, we plant seeds of positive impact that grow into a leadership legacy far more meaningful than any formal achievement. Happiness isn't something that happens to us – it must be cultivated through consistent, intentional action. By planning for leadership through daily value-driven questions, we simultaneously cultivate the happiness that comes from living authentically and the impact that defines true leadership.

Summary

The most powerful truth about leadership is both liberating and challenging: your most enduring legacy will likely have nothing to do with your plans or formal achievements. The leadership moments that profoundly change lives often slip by unrecognized – a kind word to a struggling cashier, recognizing potential in a shy student, or simply creating a moment of laughter for someone overwhelmed with doubt. These "lollipop moments" reveal that leadership isn't about position but about consistent, value-driven actions that positively impact others, whether we receive recognition for them or not. The Day One approach provides a practical framework for making these moments more intentional and consistent. By identifying your core values, defining them clearly, and creating daily questions that drive aligned actions, you transform leadership from an abstract concept into a daily practice. The magic lies in treating each day as Day One – approaching it with renewed commitment, forgiveness for past missteps, and focus on present actions rather than distant goals. This isn't about perfection but about progress – about building a pile of days where your actions reflect who you truly want to be. Whether you're facing uncertainty, building a new skill, healing from loss, or simply trying to make a difference where you are, the Day One approach offers a path forward: identify what matters most, create questions that drive action, and answer them today. Your leadership journey doesn't begin with a title or achievement; it begins with a single day – this day – when you decide that how you behave matters more than where you sit on the organizational chart.

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Drew Dudley

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