
Adelaide
Categories
Fiction, Mental Health, Audiobook, Romance, Adult, Book Club, Contemporary, Adult Fiction, Chick Lit, Literary Fiction
Content Type
Book
Binding
Hardcover
Year
2023
Publisher
St. Martin's Press
Language
English
ISBN13
9781250280848
File Download
PDF | EPUB
Adelaide Plot Summary
Introduction
In a hospital room in Chelsea, Adelaide Williams sits drowsily answering questions about her emotional state, the exact number of pills she'd just swallowed. She's waiting for the floor to give out from under her or the ceiling to cave in, for something else to push her further down. This can't be rock bottom, she thinks. It never was. The funny thing about hitting rock bottom is that you never quite know once you've reached it. Adelaide's heart is still graciously beating, pretzel salt stinging her tongue, but she doesn't want to be alive anymore. Physically, she's held together—her thighbone connected to her knee bone—but internally, mentally, she's a mess of jagged, disconnected pieces. She doesn't believe she's capable of putting herself back together. A handful of pills and a swig of water, she thought, and she'd be free—her broken pieces swept up and transferred to another spiritual plane.
Chapter 1: The Meeting of Hearts: Adelaide's Fairy Tale Begins
The skin on Adelaide's heels is coming off in chunks from an intense Korean foot mask, but that's not stopping her from preparing for another date. At twenty-six, she's thrown herself into London's dating scene with force after years of celibacy, charming strangers in text conversations and sweaty dance halls on a weekly basis. Tonight's date would be no different, she assumes—meet this boy, melt at his accent, have mediocre sex, and their fling would be over before sunrise. His name is Rory Hughes, and Adelaide hasn't decided if he's her type. His dating app photos are mostly out-of-focus group shots, but he likes the Spice Girls and their banter makes her smile. She kicks off her floral flats almost immediately upon meeting him—the same way she had two years earlier when she approached a handsome stranger at the Oxford-Cambridge boat race, telling him he looked like a Disney prince before stumbling away barefoot and mortified. Now that Disney prince stands before her again, recognizing her instantly. "Hiya, Adelaide?" Rory says, and her body goes numb. The universe has thrown them back together, and this time she won't let him slip away. Their first proper date at Soho Theatre stretches into something magical. He tells her about his gap year in France, his Cambridge education, his switch from law to film production. She shares stories of au-pairing in Paris, her many moves, the American snacks she dreams about. Four and a half hours pass like minutes before the bar staff politely inform them they're closing. Standing in the rain on Lower Marsh Street, Rory wraps his arms around Adelaide's shoulders. He pulls her closer by her elbow, tucks his hand beneath her chin, and kisses her. The sky explodes with light—birds chirping, clouds parted, sun shining. Darkness doesn't exist in this little universe Adelaide enters when she first kisses Rory Hughes.
Chapter 2: Shadows of the Past: When Trauma Shapes Love
At sixteen, Adelaide had been the type of student teachers both hoped and feared—bright and curious but unafraid to call bullshit. Boys found her intimidating with her strong opinions and refusal to party, until she met Emory Evans playing ukulele at a birthday party, singing "I'd walk through hell for you" straight into her soul. What started as coffee milkshakes and flowers for her mother slowly transformed into something darker. Adelaide began having panic attacks she couldn't explain. Her mind scrambled memories, placing some behind an opaque veil while others remained crystal clear. The pattern emerged gradually—pulled hair, pressure, every kind of pressure. When she said please stop, he called her uptight, unattracted. When she tried to resist, he questioned if she was "fucking asexual." The worst came on a Sunday morning when her sister Izzy was having an episode downstairs, screaming about wanting to die. Adelaide texted Emory for escape, and he picked her up—only to force her hand down his pants in her own driveway while her family's chaos echoed inside. She was seventeen when he took her virginity on her couch without consent, telling her "not everything has to be a big deal." Years later, Adelaide would carry this damage into every relationship. She learned to vanish before men could, to slip out of apartments in dead of night, to beat them to the punch. She redrew boundaries around superficial conversations and mechanical sex, protecting herself by never truly letting anyone in. Until Rory Hughes made her want to try again.
Chapter 3: Death's Unexpected Intrusion: Nathalie's Ghost Between Them
The call comes on a gray February afternoon while Adelaide sits in Alliance's war room, finalizing events with Sam and Djibril. Rory's voice is strained, wounded when he says the words that will shatter everything: "Nathalie died yesterday." Nathalie Alban—the stunning editor from The Times whom Adelaide had met months earlier at a book signing, the woman who'd once dated Rory for five years. The same Nathalie whose presence had haunted their entire relationship like a beautiful, charming version of the Babadook, representing all of Adelaide's fears about never being enough. Adelaide rushes to Rory's flat, her heart breaking for him and for this woman she barely knew but somehow felt connected to. She holds him as he sobs, makes tea, watches Disney films, whispers "I'm here" until he falls asleep. For days she becomes his pillar, working overnight then spending mornings and evenings caring for him while he processes the impossible loss. But something shifts in Rory's grief. He grows demanding, comparing Adelaide to Nathalie constantly—how Nat could climb career ranks without letting work consume weekends, how she appreciated his hair long, how she would have handled things differently. Every kindness Adelaide offers feels inadequate against the ghost of perfection. The night after Nathalie's funeral, as Adelaide combs her fingers through Rory's hair, three syllables slip from his mouth. "I love you," she thinks she hears. When she asks him to repeat it, he says, "Oh, I just said thank you." The words that should have been her triumph become another small heartbreak in an endless series of them.
Chapter 4: Shattering Point: Betrayal and the Breaking of Adelaide
It ends with a photograph on Raven's phone—a dating app picture of Rory Hughes, hair dripping wet, shirt clinging to his abdomen, the same grin Adelaide had fallen for. Her American colleague swipes through London men while they drink at the Fitzroy Tavern, and there he is, hunting for something better. Adelaide's world tilts. She rushes to the bathroom, calls Rory, demands answers. "At work," he texts. "Can't talk right now." When she confronts him about the app, he stumbles through excuses—it was just for a few days, when they were "on a break" last month. "A break?" Adelaide asks. She'd told him she needed space for a few days because she was falling apart, and he'd gotten on a dating app. Research proves profiles inactive for more than fourteen days are removed, and seventy-five percent of shown profiles have been active within seventy-two hours. Two days before Raven found his profile, they'd been having sex in a sculpture garden. For the first time in eighteen months, Adelaide considers letting go of this fantasy. She calls him that evening, her voice steady despite her breaking heart: "This doesn't need to be a long conversation. I wish you the best, but I'm done now." He would challenge her, claim victimhood, cite his terrible year of suffering. But Adelaide had lent him her whole heart, her body, her broken pieces—and he'd intentionally betrayed her trust while she held him together. "I can't come back from this," she tells him, and means it. Moving day arrives with mismatched couches and a bitchy landlord, work emails piling up, friends scattered across continents. Adelaide sits on her undressed mattress, sees that the London Book Awards have named an entire category after Nathalie—the Nathalie Alban Award, Recognizing Excellence in Young Editors. The punch lands square in her chest.
Chapter 5: Reclaiming the Self: Finding Light in Fractured Places
Adelaide wakes up in the hospital to Celeste's concerned face and warm croissants from Le Pain Quotidien. The diagnosis comes swift and startling—bipolar disorder, type two. Her sister Izzy had always been the mentally ill one, but mental illness is a shape-shifter, appearing in different forms while bearing the same name. The medication trials begin, some leaving her terrified to touch radiators lest they melt her skin, others finally allowing her to sleep. Dr. Grayson prescribes aripiprazole, and slowly, mercifully, the world stops feeling like it's on fire. Adelaide takes leave from work, finds a therapist named Meg who calls her "Sugar" and burns sandalwood candles. "You completely emptied your tank on someone who fucked you over," Meg tells her, "and that is a horrible feeling you are absolutely allowed to feel. You're running on empty, Adelaide. But we're going to figure out how to refill your tank." The steps become clearer: medication to stabilize the chemicals, therapy to process the trauma, boundaries to protect her healing heart. Adelaide learns that feeling everything—truly everything—isn't a character flaw but a feature that requires careful management. She starts to fill her lungs with air, her tank with fuel, her brain with what it needs. On New Year's Eve, drunk on eggnog and hope, Adelaide makes three resolutions: get a dog, get back on dating apps, don't be such a fucking disaster in 2020. She adopts Fitz, a fluffy Cavoodle who immediately pees in her living room corner while she grins and cleans it up with paper towels.
Chapter 6: New Beginnings: Building a Life Beyond Heartbreak
The dating app reveals another cosmic coincidence—Bubs appears on her screen, Rory's old roommate who'd driven her home on rainy nights and offered tissues during breakdowns. His real name is Brennan Uralla-Burke, and he's been quietly caring about Adelaide's wellbeing far longer than she realized. Their first drink leads to easy conversation about immigration law, about the dog named Fitz, about how "Don't Stop Believin'" is both the best and worst karaoke song. When Adelaide explains her breakup diplomatically, Brennan's response is simple: "You deserve so much more." The words land differently than all the others because she's finally ready to believe them. Years pass. Adelaide runs through Green Park with Fitz, building strength in her body and mind. She glimpses Rory in the distance—older now, wedding ring catching sunlight as he bends to tie his shoes. Her stomach twists briefly, but the feeling passes. He married Ivy, his first girlfriend, the American from sixth form. The boy who could only love in past tense found his way back to familiar territory. But Adelaide loves differently—diving headfirst, all-consuming and present. She learns that not all love needs to feel like swimming in winter, chilling and exhilarating but numbingly cold. Some love feels like curling up by the fireplace, warming bones and heart with each sip of companionship. The Moleskine notebook she'd bought for Rory—embossed with his initials, meant to hold their autumn plans—sits forgotten in a drawer. She'd planned to give him a collection of moments to anticipate, but Adelaide has learned something better: how to create moments worth remembering for herself.
Summary
Adelaide Williams discovers that the most important people enter our lives when we need them most—not when we least expect them, but when the universe knows we require their presence. Perhaps she wasn't meant to receive Rory's love but to offer her own when he needed it most, carrying him through his darkest season with donations to memorial funds, midnight milkshake deliveries, and endless compassion. The fairy tale she'd imagined—Disney prince, English accent, happily ever after—transforms into something more complex and ultimately more nourishing. Adelaide learns that broken pieces can be reassembled into stronger configurations, that mental illness requires the same careful attention as any chronic condition, and that loving fiercely doesn't mean accepting crumbs when cake and champagne await. In Angel's garden where Fitz plays among the peonies, Adelaide tends to orchids and pillar candles, building a life illuminated by genuine warmth rather than borrowed light. She carries Rory's memory in a small shelf of her heart—not as a wound that defines her, but as proof of her capacity to love fully even when that love isn't returned. The darkness that once threatened to consume her now serves as reminder of her strength, her ability to navigate back to light. She is alive, she is loved, she is breathing. She is here, and everything is going to be okay.
Best Quote
“Pain is pain is pain...no matter how large or small your problems, your losses, your wounds--they are yours. And you're allowed to feel them. The hardest loss will always be your own.” ― Genevieve Wheeler, Adelaide
Review Summary
Strengths: The review highlights the emotional depth of the book, emphasizing its ability to evoke strong feelings and connect with the reader's heart and soul. The portrayal of supportive friendships is noted as a positive aspect, providing a counterbalance to the protagonist's struggles. Weaknesses: The review suggests that the book can be dark, depressing, and potentially triggering for some readers, particularly due to its exploration of emotional abuse and the protagonist's painful experiences. Overall: The reader expresses a strong emotional connection to the story, feeling empathy for the protagonist, Adelaide. The book is recommended for its emotional impact and exploration of complex themes, though it may not be suitable for all due to its darker elements.
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